Witty Stories

TaleTown.Org multimedia witty and humorous English short stories and retold tales

  • Are you kidding me?"Absolutely," the voice confirmed, "I'm telling you man, it's going to be the coldest winter on record."

    "How can you be so sure?" the Chief wanted to be positively certain. Even the experts can get it wrong sometimes despite all the technology in use.

  • Loving Couple‘The Considerate Husband’ is an effort to understand the female mind!

    Funny story on how the final 3 wishes of a dying man were interpreted by his loving wife...

  • Look way up...As they milled about on le Champ de Mars, loud discussions raged about the chances of the frogs.

    "No way anyone will get to the top!” said one.

    "Yeah, it's just too far for the poor buggers," agreed another.

  • MinnowsZhuangzi knew about the happiness of fish, but Huizi’s skepticism only gets him circular answers.

    Funny story of the famous Chinese philosopher’s clever rejoinders...

  • Inter-species Bonding:  Miniature Horse meets Miniature GoatFunny business management story" The Horse & The Goat

    Interesting and insightful corporate lessons.

    The secret to survival in our corporate world is …

  • Elephant laughing out loudFunny Story: The Jester Returns

    Rosh responds with classical elephant jokes when Hosh grills his tired father on elephants.

     

  • Ra“Midas was stupid”, Josh voiced his opinion, “why didn’t he just wear gloves? That would have been much safer."

    "He could have had the gold and touched things without turning them into gold.”

    There was pin drop silence for a moment. Then Hosh spoke up.

  • Touch,feel,power“Everything he touched turned instantly into gold. It was miraculous!"

    "He touched a tree. Gold! He touched a stone. Gold! He touched a piece of shit. Gold!”

    “Wow!” said Josh, “I really want that golden touch. Can Dionysus make me rich too? ”

  • Smile at a stranger“Beer – helping people enjoy sex since about 5,000 BC - is also made of grains. All healthy stuff. Drink more, be healthier. Have sex, be even more healthier."

    "Beer also helps a man show his emotions. Spill one and he'll cry.”

  • AMERICAN CROW“Come on Pa,” Josh was incredulous. “That story can’t be literally true."

    "Crows are stupid. Look at that one. He looks stupid, he acts stupid, he talks stupid. Aesop must have seen a special crow.”

  • Marriage01-001Funny Story: Troubleshooting Wife 1.0

    Just upgraded from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0?

    Try Flowers 3.1 and Diamonds 2K. Quarantine Secretary With Mini Skirt 3.3!

  • One Tom"You've always been the second boy, spotting opportunities where others couldn't see them. Finding silver linings even in manure! Put the same hat on."

    "Your real boss is the one who walks around under your own hat."

  • Vigeland - coupleUnderstanding your partner is easy. Just a few simple rules, which a woman should know.

    Rosh tells Isha what men want & how to keep men happy.

    She reciprocates...

  • Day 236 - West Midlands Police - Force Traffic BikerWhen the Chief got on the radio, the cop told him that he'd stopped a limo doing over a 100 in a 50 mph zone.

    "So bust him," barked the Chief.

  • Buffet fit for a KingFunny story: What does Khan eat?

    Rosh wants to eat his money’s worth while dining at Valentines – a NZ buffet restaurant.

    His antics remind Qosh of Khan’s tale

  • Sentimental onion"The first type is The Onion Salary."

    "You get it, you open it, and you weep."

  • coffeeFunny Story: Who will make Coffee?

    Bible is invoked to settle a domestic row between a couple over who should brew the coffee daily.

    Retold Bible joke

  • meeting_hammer illustrationYou might have heard people being fired for not doing well, but there are many whose careers are destroyed simply because they do too well.

    Too well for their own good.

  • Dancing Through the Light at Green Wood CemeteryYours Faithfully – a funny story with a retold joke about a miser who wanted his wealth buried with him.

    His faithful wife kept her promise, but...