Witty Stories

TaleTown.Org multimedia witty and humorous English short stories and retold tales

  • Advantages Of Being Short

    the boy's first camping trip"Pa, I am the shortest in my class," complained Josh, "and people tease me for that."

    "Do they?" answered Rosh, "Well, they don't know the secret advantages of being short then."

  • Angry Buddha

    Fell On Black DaysMiss Nuyen started bubbling over with anger, but years of ritualistic practice held her down.

    "Namo Amitabh Buddh, Namo Amitabh Buddh..." she continued, trying to hurry through the 10 minutes frantically.

  • Animal Pets! Or Animal Pests?

    DSC_0344"Animals also have some special dietary needs," Josh agreed, "You can't feed your goldfish chicken bones."

    "The bone is probably bigger than the fish anyway!" Rosh joked, "And you can't get your dog to eat grass clippings".

  • Animals That Stammer

    Cat playing peek a boo"I don't think I could handle any more stammering animals, pet," Isha smiled down at him, "One's enough in this household."

    "And by the way, animals do stammer!"

  • Any Asshole Will Do

    Day 170/365 - God Loves Assholes"Senior Management is happy as it believes the workforce has become efficient, customers are happy because they believe the company is delivering value for money, and workers won't squeal because they need jobs. Whoever bells the cat, won't be making any friends. So, I guess for the moment, we have a stalemate."

    "As long as he pretends that you are getting a fair wage", she responded, "you can pretend you're working hard. Outlast him."

  • Auf Wiedersehen. Good Bye!

    Smeesh-Smosh the Stunt Man"No! No!" answer da tower, "Wus your altitude, an where your location?"

    "Pierre say, "Man, rat now ah got a positive attitude, an ah'm from Thibodeaux, Laweezeeanna!"

  • Bang Bang!

    flying with the angels“How are you feeling, Richard?” Hosh asked.

    "I've never felt better, Doc” Richard beamed back, “I have a 20-year-old bride now. And she is pregnant with my child. What do you think about that?"

  • Barbers Don't Exist!

    Lift-off..."You know what?" he said to the barber. "Barbers don't exist."

    "How can you say that?" asked the surprised barber. "I am here, and I am a barber. I just worked on you. Have you forgotten so quickly?"

  • Be Informed To Spot Opportunities

    SnaresBe informed to spot opportunities in business & life.

    Learning business management becomes easy, when Sunny shows the benefits of being informed using a nun joke...

  • Buffet At Valentines

    FunctionsRecent New Zealand immigrant Rosh takes his family out dining at an Auckland restaurant.

    Clean, cool, glamorous place to dine out. Carpet, chandeliers, flowers, fragrance, music, maidens, all around.

    The family has an interesting experience

  • Business Is Business

    Is It Really That Funny?!“Well, the teacher said she’ll give a chocolate fish to the child who can tell her, who the most famous man was, who ever lived," Josh replied.

    "So, what happened then?" she asked.

  • Cancel Your Credit Card

    3D Shackled Credit by StockMonkeys.comBank: When she applied for the card, she agreed to and signed its Terms and Conditions.

    Relative: Perhaps you could resend her a copy of those. Would you like her new mailing address?

  • Caught You Red-Handed

    Blow Your Mind"Time passed slowly and the expectation that he was finally going to eat made his stomach growl with eager anguish."

    "Geshe Ben was so hungry that he found it difficult to wait. His eyes kept returning to the jar of food within his reach."

  • Check Mate

    Check, MateFunny story with retold men jokes, like:

    What do men and beer bottles have in common? What do men and sperm have in common?...

    What's the difference between men and...

  • Company Policy

    managementRosh lampoons Company Policy again, when his quarterly pay review delivers no increments.

    Funny business management story with retold jokes on company policies...

  • Complementary Relationships

    Call for volunteers at the world’s largest Donkey SanctuaryUsing funny equations, Satyadev shows that complementary relationships exist between men who earn money & women who spend money.

    Making them both donkeys... Joke.

  • Cooking Rosh Style

    Halloween chefCooking Rosh style turns out to be an interesting culinary adventure for Rosh and Isha, much more exciting than the quiet candlelight dinner they had planned.

     

  • Desires

    The fondest wishWords fished out unknown desires from the depths of his mind, when Rosh weaved words aloud into a funny poem for Isha.

    Their kids jumped in, singing & banging...

  • Diderot’s Old Dressing Gown

    Statue de Diderot“Master the Diderot Effect”, Rosh said simply, “Diderot’s story had a lesson. That poverty has its freedoms; opulence has its obstacles.”

    “Hundreds of years before Diderot, Kabir preached the same message. That less is more. Be happy as you are. मन लागो मेरो यार फकीरी में (mann laago mero yaar fakiri mein).”

  • Dishonesty – The Better Policy

    owMaskedLying works, and is good for us. When we do it well, we get what we want. If we don't get what we want, we know that we need to improve on our lying skills. More lying practice is needed. That's why we lie all the time.

    Tests conducted in 2002 by Feldman, showed that students told three lies on average per ten minutes of conversation.